Every delivery driver has a collection. Not of packages — of notes. Those little text boxes where customers type delivery instructions have produced some of the most hilarious, baffling, and occasionally maddening messages in the history of human communication.
We scoured Quora threads, TikTok, Reddit, Newsweek, and driver forums to collect the wildest delivery notes that real drivers have actually received. Some of these will make you laugh out loud in your van. Others will make you want to mark the stop as undeliverable and drive away forever.
The Impossible Request
Amazon driver Big B went viral on TikTok after pulling up to an apartment complex and reading the customer's delivery note: PLEASE LEAVE AT THE REAR DOOR!!!
One small problem: it was an apartment complex. There is no rear door.
The all-caps didn't help either. As Big B put it — why are customers yelling at him through text? Fellow drivers flooded the comments with sympathy. One wrote: I HATEEE when they use all caps... I'm not ur servant. Another joked that customers want you to Spider-Man up the balcony.
The kicker? Some customers admitted they update their notes but drivers still deliver wrong. Others admitted they forgot those instructions were from a previous address entirely.
Source: Daily Dot — Amazon driver pulls up to apartment, then takes a closer look at delivery notes
Tony and the Wine Emergency
A handwritten note taped to a door went viral on Reddit with over 18,000 upvotes. Tony needed his UPS driver to know one critical thing:
UPS guy, I'm out back mowing the lawn, and the quality of my weekend depends on this wine delivery.
Tony had included a hand-drawn diagram of his house, the UPS van's expected position, and his own location in the backyard. The arrows, labels, and overall vibe were pure art. Reddit loved it — and honestly, every driver has met a Tony. These are the customers who make the job worth it.
Source: Newsweek — Man's Humorous Note to UPS Driver Over Important Wine Delivery
The Jedi Pizza Party
One food delivery driver arrived at a college dorm expecting a normal drop-off. The order was $200 worth of pizza. What he found was 15 guys in cloaks wielding lightsabers.
They called him Master Jedi of the zaa technique and tipped him $100. No context was given. No context was needed. Sometimes the delivery notes just say an address and a phone number, and the real instructions are waiting for you in full costume.
Source: Bored Panda — 19 Of The Weirdest Things Seen By Food Delivery Drivers
Wear the Sombrero and Speak Only Spanish
The delivery instruction read:
There is a sombrero on the front steps. Please wear it and speak only Spanish.
The driver complied. The customers were drunk college kids who apparently thought this was the funniest thing they'd ever arranged. The driver was rewarded with a generous tip. Is it weird? Absolutely. Would most drivers do it for a good tip? Also absolutely.
Source: Eat This, Not That — 8 Hilarious Special Requests Customers Have Had for Their Food Deliveries
The Rope Pulley System
Sometimes the wildest instructions are also the most practical. One driver received this note:
Text me when you arrive, and come to the side of the house. I broke my leg and I can't come downstairs, but I'll lower a backpack down to you on a rope. Your tip is in the loop on the back. Thanks!
The driver was skeptical. It sounded like a prank or a robbery setup. But it was completely legit. A backpack came down on a rope. The tip was inside. The pizza went up. No words were exchanged. Peak delivery efficiency.
Source: Bored Panda — 19 Of The Weirdest Things Seen By Food Delivery Drivers
The Breakup Pizza
A woman ordered a pizza to her soon-to-be ex-boyfriend's address. The delivery instruction?
Tell Andrew it is over.
That's it. That's the note. Imagine being the driver who has to ring the doorbell, hand over a pepperoni, and then relay a breakup message. Imagine being Andrew.
For the record: drivers are not therapists, mediators, or messengers of heartbreak. But apparently some of us are.
Source: Eat This, Not That — 8 Hilarious Special Requests
The Fall Heard Around TikTok
UPS driver Steven Benavides was delivering a package in Texas when he slipped and fell down the porch steps. It happens — porches are treacherous. But instead of being embarrassed, Steven left a note for the homeowner:
I just fell so bad on your porch. Watch the ring camera for a good laugh. LOL. Text me the video plz!
The homeowner did. Steven posted it on TikTok. Ten million views. A scraped knee and a legendary sense of humor turned an embarrassing moment into internet gold.
Source: Newsweek — Comical Moment Delivery Driver Falls Down Porch Steps Viewed 10M Times
Send a Virgo
The delivery instruction simply read: Send a Virgo.
No context about the food. No gate code. No apartment number. Just an astrological requirement for the person delivering their meal. Drivers have reported customers requesting the cutest driver, a driver who can do the stanky leg, or one who will gobble like a turkey upon arrival.
Look — we appreciate the creativity. But we're also trying to deliver 30 stops in two hours. A gate code would be more helpful than a birth chart.
Source: Cheezburger — 20+ Funny food delivery instructions that had nothing to do with food
What Drivers Actually Want You to Write
After laughing at all of these, let's talk about what actually helps. Drivers universally agree on what makes a good delivery note:
- Gate code or buzzer number — the single most useful piece of information
- Which door to use — front, side, back (but only if it actually exists)
- Where to leave the package — behind the planter, on the bench, inside the screen door
- Landmarks — the blue house, corner lot, the one with the giant inflatable dinosaur
- Dog warnings — seriously, this one could save a driver from a bad day (or worse)
- Parking tips — especially for apartments and condos where parking is a nightmare
And a few things to avoid:
- ALL CAPS — it reads as yelling and doesn't make us more likely to comply
- Outdated notes — if you moved, update your instructions. That note about the blue gate might be sending drivers to a stranger's house
- Contradictions — leave at gate / do not leave at gate / bring to garage. Pick one.
- Multi-paragraph essays — if your delivery note is longer than this article, something has gone wrong
If you use FlexMesh for your routes, you can add custom notes to any stop — perfect for flagging tricky addresses, noting gate codes, or warning other drivers about that house with the sombrero on the porch.
The Delivery Note Hall of Fame
These notes are funny because they're real. Behind every wild instruction is a real driver who had to make a real decision: do I wear the sombrero or not? Do I gobble like a turkey? Do I tell Andrew it's over?
The truth is, these moments are what make the job memorable. Between the monotony of scan-drive-deliver-repeat, a good delivery note can make your whole day. And the terrible ones? Those become the stories you tell other drivers over coffee.
Keep sharing them. Keep laughing. And please — update your delivery notes.
Scan. Optimize. Navigate. Deliver.
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